Abby McDonald

Finding the Hope of Christ in a Messy Life

  • Home
  • About
  • Book
  • Speaking
  • Coaching & Resources
  • Blog
  • Contact

To the Frustrated Person Trying to Hear God’s Voice

February 7, 2019 by Abby McDonald

I longed for a clear sign. My husband and I were about to make a life-altering decision, but all I felt was uncertainty and confusion.

Should we stay or should we go? And if we stayed, what would that mean for our family?

In scripture, we’re told that the God we serve is not one of confusion. So, the chaos I felt in my head was not a result of him, but of looking to other sources for my answers. Internet searches. Weighing pros and cons. Consulting with family and friends.

All these voices telling me what or what not to do soon became a source of endless chatter. But rather than feel informed, I felt overwhelmed.

While all of these methods of decision-making weren’t necessarily bad, I realized one day that I’d spent very little time sitting before God, praying, and seeking. If my heart’s desire was to know his will, wouldn’t prayer and time in his presence be a good place to start?

When we want to hear from God, I think we often make it more difficult than it actually is. Lord knows, I do. Last spring I led a women’s Bible study about becoming unstuck in our spiritual walk, and the single most common frustration I heard from women was that they had difficulty discerning God’s voice.

The good news is that God wants to communicate with us. His ways of reaching us are limitless because he is infinite. But how do we know we’re hearing from him and not conjecturing something out of our own heads? When we step out in faith, how can we be confident we’re following him and not our own wants?

The more I get to know Jesus, the more I learn he does speak to me. But to hear him, I have to filter out the noise. Here are a few characteristics of his voice that I’ve come to recognize:

  1. It’s not hurried.

I believe when danger is imminent, the Spirit often warns us. And there are seasons when there will be more deadlines and busyness than others. While we are to be diligent and make good use of our time, our God is a relational being. His Word uses terms like “rest,” “abide,” and “still,” but I don’t recall the gospels telling us Jesus rushed to get places, even when he had a lot of work to do.

When we make people feel like check marks on our to-do list, it stings. And to be honest, I think it hurts God too.

If we want to hear him, we have to stop scrolling and rushing long enough to listen.

We sit. We wait. We slow down because his presence is worth it.

  1. It’s consistent and steady.

When we see the Lord change his mind about something in scripture, it’s about withholding judgment. We see this in Exodus when Moses convinces him not to destroy the entire nation of Israel after worshipping a golden calf in place of their God. (Exodus 32:14)

However, when it comes to God’s ultimate will for our lives, it remains unchanging. We’re to love him and honor him. We’re to be an extension of his love to those we do life with and draw others to Christ through our words and actions.

If we follow this simple command, we don’t have to stay in limbo, wondering if we misheard him. We take the next step forward, and when we’re ready, he’ll reveal more of his plan to us.

“For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God.”

2 Corinthians 1:20 NIV

  1. It’s a voice that propels, not threatens.

I’ve made a lot of poor decisions that were based off a fear of missing out rather than seeking God’s will. I’ve overcommitted, spread myself too thin, and made people-pleasing first on my agenda.

But here’s the thing. Saying “yes” to God often means saying “no” to others. It often means saying “no” to activities that seem good, and worthy of our time. However, upon closer examination, they’re not the best God has for us.

To produce the best fruit in us, God has to prune the good fruit too. (John 15:2)

He does this not with an anger and vengeance, but with love. Not with threats, but with an invitation to more.

By lifting the burdens that are weighing us down, he’s able to propel us into the future he has for us.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us…”

Hebrews 12:1 NIV

Remember our big decision? Well, when I finally got alone with God, I saw the answer. His leading was clear, and my husband and I made the choice without reservation.

It wasn’t easy, but we knew it was the right path. And in time, he affirmed it, over and over again.

Following God doesn’t mean our roads won’t be difficult. Sometimes, there’s turbulence and bumps that make us question whether we heard him at all. Other times, there’s pain and heartache.

But in the midst of the highs and the lows, there’s also peace. There’s a soul-deep knowledge that no matter what, he’s right there, holding us close as we move forward in faith.

It’s an irreplaceable feeling. It’s an unspeakable joy.

Share if you care!

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Pinterest
  • LinkedIn
  • Email
  • Print

Filed Under: faith, spiritual growth Tagged With: #voiceofGod #spiritualgrowth

Let’s Stay Connected

Subscribe to receive encouragement and my latest posts via email.

Privacy Policy

Comments

  1. Christy says

    February 7, 2019 at 7:20 am

    Wise teaching Abby.
    xoxo

    • Abby McDonald says

      February 8, 2019 at 10:24 am

      Thank you, friend. xoxo

  2. Jeanne says

    February 7, 2019 at 9:39 am

    Good word. Thank you.

    • Abby McDonald says

      February 8, 2019 at 10:24 am

      Thank you, Jeanne. Thanks for visiting. Hope you have a great weekend.

  3. Lisa Appelo says

    February 7, 2019 at 2:00 pm

    It’s true that we need to still all the other voices (including my own!) to listen to God’s. And that fear of missing out can make me detour every time. I love that we have to knit ourselves to God to discern his will though, because it keeps us right where we are supposed to be. Good words, Abby.

    • Abby McDonald says

      February 8, 2019 at 10:25 am

      Oh yes, that’s a big one for me too. I’m so thankful He speaks to us when we’re willing to listen. Thanks so much for reading, Lisa.

  4. Kristi Woods says

    February 7, 2019 at 4:59 pm

    Gosh, fear of missing out is a biggie. Seems to be even more of an issue these days with technology and social media. I have to check myself on this one. Glad you and your husband found the wise and godly choice, Abby.

    • Abby McDonald says

      February 8, 2019 at 10:26 am

      That FOMO is such a big one, isn’t it? I’m slowly learning that I don’t need to be everywhere, all the time. 😉 Thanks for visiting, friend.

  5. Monika says

    February 8, 2019 at 6:04 am

    Well said!

    • Abby McDonald says

      February 8, 2019 at 10:27 am

      Thank you, Monika! I’m so thankful He speaks to us, when slow down enough to listen. 😉 Have a great weekend.

  6. Elizabeth says

    February 8, 2019 at 8:35 am

    It has spoken to me! Thanks a lot for sharing!

    • Abby McDonald says

      February 8, 2019 at 10:27 am

      So thankful to hear that, Elizabeth. Praise God. Have a great weekend!

  7. Heather Mertens says

    February 9, 2019 at 12:37 am

    Woah, Abby, I just finished reading this a little while after I literally posted a post on FB about the “sting”… “When we make people feel like check marks on our to-do list, it stings.” You got that right, my friend.

    I totally get it. I mean we can’t be everything to everyone, and I, too, have a hard time keeping it all lined up just perfect, but that sting… 🙁
    I have made hearing God a priority… even when He is silent, because loving outward and getting answers sometimes go hand in hand. Lovely encouragement here. <3

  8. Ashley Rowland | HISsparrowBlog says

    February 12, 2019 at 11:54 am

    Love your point about God’s voice not being threatening (and the rest too!). It’s a great reminder that He doesn’t use fear, guilt, and anger to direct us. Great post!

  9. Mary Carver says

    February 12, 2019 at 6:17 pm

    Such a great reminder, Abby. I just started seeking God’s will on a big decision, and when I saw your link I knew I needed this word. Thank you.

Hi! I'm Abby and I'm so glad you're here. I am a wife and a mom of two very energetic boys and one sweet baby girl. When I'm not chasing them around I love to write about my love for a God who relentlessly pursued me, even during my darkest times. READ MORE...

Let’s Stay Connected

Subscribe to receive encouragement and my latest posts via email.

Privacy Policy

Stay Connected

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Popular Posts

How God Responds When His Own Want to Die
When You're Losing Hope in Your Season of Waiting
Why Didn't God Answer My Prayers?
5 Ways to Promote Unity in the Church

You Can Find Me Here

Take the Challenge

Categories

Recent Facebook Posts

Recent Facebook Posts

Recent Pins

Latest Instagram Feed

“Go back to your why.” A dear friend said thi “Go back to your why.”

A dear friend said this to me earlier this week and I knew she spoke wisdom. For months, I’d felt like the creative joy and energy had been sucked right out of me. As much as I tell coaching clients to find their why remember it, I too am prone to forget. 

Much of the time, this happens when I get stuck in the land of “have to.” Perhaps you’ve been there too. We think things like:

👉🏼 I have do _______ to attract the eyes of a publisher.
👉🏼 I have to keep up with the ever changing algorithms on social media.
👉🏼I have to write on this topic, even though it’s not what I’m passionate about.
👉🏼 I have to do ________because all these other authors are doing it.

There is nothing that will suck the joy out of the creative spirit like this mindset. Lord knows, I’ve been there. I’ve gotten sucked into the all consuming drive to keep up and produce.

And I’m tired. So this Advent, I’m taking time remember my why. I’m remembering what brings me joy and why I love writing. As I seek God’s leading in this time of reflection, I’m so glad it’s His joy that is my strength.

#creativemindset #writingcoach #writinglife
Years ago, God spoke to my heart through desperate Years ago, God spoke to my heart through desperate attempts to start a fire in our wood stove. The fire was practically non-existent. And at the time, my spiritual life felt pretty stagnant as well. 

As any seasoned camper may know, fires need three basic components: heat, fuel, and oxygen. I had given my fire plenty of heat and fuel, but I’d neglected oxygen almost altogether. Instead of giving my flame room to breathe by spreading the wood in a triangular shape, I’d smothered it.

Fires need room to breathe. And much like the flame I’d suffocated with its own fuel, I often adapt the same pattern in my spiritual life.

I know my heat comes from the Holy Spirit living inside me, so I feed the flame with his Word and plenty of good reading material, podcasts and worship. I gather with other believers, lead and serve.

But often, I don’t allow space to breathe. To digest what he’s teaching me. To sit in his presence and be still with no agenda, no checklist or index of requests.

While we fixate on the lines of our life story, God often speaks in the margins.

In the spaces in-between the carpools, the play dates and the prayer meetings. In the moments where we slow down, we sit and we wait.

“Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”
Psalm 46:10 NIV

So instead of piling more stuff onto my never-ending to-do list, I’m carving out time to listen. I’m creating a space to not simply read the Word, but hear from the Word.

Many times, we throw too many scraps on our spiritual fire, suffocating it so it has no room to breathe. I am guilty. I’ve placed a list of chores on the altar of life, forgetting what God wants most is my heart.

But thanks be to God, his mercies are new every morning. Today a new day. Fan the flame.

#fantheflame #advent #dailydevotional
Something it took me a long time to learn as a mom Something it took me a long time to learn as a mom: Your kids just want you. They want your time and attention, and most of the time couldn’t care less about perfectly curated, Pinterest worthy treats, parties and gatherings. 

I used to stress myself out about these details. I would spend hours scouring Etsy for party decorations and days cutting out banners. Not because I enjoyed it, but because I felt like this is what a good mom did. Over time, I realized what my kids wanted was really quite simple. They wanted to roll out cookie dough with me and to have conversations. They wanted me to let them have their friends over even when the house wasn’t perfect.

When I embraced this shift, I felt free to be the mom God created me to be. Because if we can’t enjoy the small moments, we miss out on what truly matters most. 

#chasewhatmatters #mothersofdaughters #momssupportingmoms #encouragingmoms #surprisedbymotherhood
There are a lot of things we can’t control durin There are a lot of things we can’t control during this season. And if we focus on these uncertainties, they can steal our peace faster than we can say, “Merry Christmas.” 🎄 

We can’t control:

👉🏼 Other people’s opinions
👉🏼 How someone will react 
👉🏼 Other people’s choices

But we can control what we do with one major gift: our time. We can spend it focusing on our people. We can immerse our minds and bodies in environments that give us peace. 

We can control:

👉🏼 The boundaries we place on our time
👉🏼 What we choose to focus on
👉🏼 How we respond to others 

Most of all, we can focus on the greatest gift of this season: Emmanuel, God with us. ✨ Thank God for His promise to renew us, day by day. 

#holidayseason #advent #christmastime #faithwriters
2023 was a year of new beginnings. A new career ve 2023 was a year of new beginnings. A new career venture. A new book idea. A decision to let go of things that no longer fit.

But it was also a year of loss and disappointment. It was a year I asked hard questions I still don’t know the answers to, and grieved for things that are hard to articulate with words. I’m learning that joy doesn’t dissipate the grief and our tears don’t have to be defined. They heal us in their own mysterious way, and holding them back only prolongs the process toward restoration.

As I wait in this in-between season of Advent, I anticipate the new, but I also reflect on the old. I don’t want to miss the beautiful truths God taught us, and continues to reveal. In both the present day to day journey and the future, this is my prayer for each of us:

“Now may the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.”

‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭13:20-21‬ ‭NIV‬‬

#christmastime #advent #prayerlife
At this time of year, I often feel like I have to At this time of year, I often feel like I have to create my own magic. The expectations of kids, family and others can send me into high stress mode, and before I know it I’ve forgotten the greatest gift of this season.

Last week I sat in church listening to Christmas carols and wondered if there was a way to love others well but not drown in the weight of expectations. If we could somehow balance the desire to give and serve without sacrificing the wonder of the season.

One of the things I love about the Christmas story is how God used the most ordinary surroundings and circumstances to display the miraculous.

He took a barn and a feeding trough, and made it a dwelling place for the King of Kings. He took the one of the lowest social classes, the shepherds, and made them first to not only hear the good news, but to share it.

God did the preparation and the planning. Everything occurred exactly as it was foretold.

“When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.””
Luke 2:15 NIV

Friend, I don’t know what kind of expectations or stress you’re encountering this season. Whether it’s a child with an unrealistic Christmas list or a family member who triggers you like no other, I don’t want to downplay the reality you might be facing.

But I also want to remind you of this: One of the greatest ways we can we can magnify God’s presence is to be present for those we love.

To slow down enough to enjoy the moments we often rush past. To listen to their crazy stories and anecdotes, and let them know we care about the details.

We may not prepare the perfect meal or check off all the to-do items on our list, but we can savor the time we have. And when we do this, God shows up in ways we could never foresee or anticipate.

#thegreatestgift #christmasblessings #tistheseason #chasewhatmatters
Do you remember that inner kid in you? The one who Do you remember that inner kid in you? The one who embraced creativity without worrying about other’s response to it? The girl who danced without wondering if someone would post it on YouTube?

She’s still there. Ask God to help you remember her carefree spirit and wonder. He’s more than capable. The freedom of creativity is at your fingertips.

Ask. Like a little child, come to Him.

#creativespace #writingpractice #creativespirit
Several months ago, I felt like I was walking thro Several months ago, I felt like I was walking through a never-ending spiritual fog. My tried-and-true ways of connecting with God weren’t working, and my faith felt tired and routine. When I opened my Bible, I didn’t feel the same fervor I once had.

Sometimes I fall into a pattern of thinking I need to have everything completed on an invisible checklist to attain connection with God. But God wants me to enjoy Him like a kid lost in her daddy’s embrace. In Mark 10, we see people were bringing their children to Jesus for Him to put His hands on them and bless them. When His disciples rebuked the parents, Jesus admonished, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it” (Mark 10:14-15).

As I studied these verses, one word stood out to me: “receive.” Jesus reminds us that the Kingdom of God is a gift we receive, not something we strive to attain by completing items on a checklist. When we declare our faith with our mouths and accept Jesus as Lord, we are given a place in His Kingdom forever.

I’ve added this to my morning prayer: God, help me live in the joy of Your presence.

Although dry seasons still come, God used this time of my life to awaken the childlike wonder in me. He showed me how a simple, heartfelt prayer can shift my perspective, and it’s one I continue to pray today.

When was the last time you just sat and enjoyed God’s presence?

#seekhimfirst #hisgrace #proverbs31
I’ve always been drawn to lighthouses. If our fa I’ve always been drawn to lighthouses. If our family is on vacation and there’s one nearby, it’s a must visit. Several years ago, we visited the Cape Hatteras Lighthouse, which was moved in 1999 due to erosion of the shoreline and shifting of the island. Even this brick structure, the tallest in the U.S., was subject to the elements.

Once moved back on solid ground, its light shined again. The foundation underneath made all the difference.

As my boys and I made our way up the 259 steps to the top of the lighthouse, I sensed God saying to me, “Come back to solid ground.”

Over the past month, I’d felt controlled by elements too. But it wasn’t the heat, wind, or waves that made me lose my footing. It was my emotions. 

Although the brick of the lighthouse was painted on the outside, inside you could see much of the original red tones. These exposed bricks had a deep, rich color to them, like blood.

The visual picture reminded me of the truth: His blood is my solid ground. My security. The truth in the midst of shaky emotions and lies.

And you know what? The same is true for you, once you are in Christ. Because of his blood, none of these core facets of our lives change:
 
1. Our identity
His grace covers us. The day we decided to become his, he placed his seal on us. (2 Corinthians 1:22) We are his daughters and we belong to him.
 
2. Our future hope
No matter what happens in the days to come, God is for us. Others may ridicule us, abandon us, or misunderstand, but he will never turn his back.
 
3. Our access to the Helper
We weren’t created to walk through this life fighting the lies of the enemy with our own power. We were sent a Helper, who equips us with truth, leads our prayers, and intercedes for us. (Romans 8:26)

Keeping our feet on solid ground is not a passive undertaking. It is a daily battle. But the battle is worth it. And as we stand there on the Word that brings life, the arrows start to fall like dead weights. The elements may thunder, but they can’t overtake us. Because we’ve turned our eyes to the power Who controls them.

#hisgrace #solidground #faithwriter
Follow on Instagram

Copyright © 2023 Abby McDonald | Design by The Design Diva | Development by MRM | Privacy Policy

The 5 Days to Life Unstuck Challenge

Are there areas of your life where you can’t seem to find breakthrough? Do you feel as though your keep praying the same prayers over and over, but you’re not getting anywhere?

A life stuck is one that never moves into the fullness Christ created us to have.

This is why I created the “5 Days to Life Unstuck Challenge”. In this 5-day challenge, we will look at five key areas where the enemy likes for us to stay stuck. Then, we will implement a simple, doable mindset shift.

Ready to get get unstuck?

CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP!